Joke Emails

Virus Warning

Subject: WARNING: COMPUTER VIRUS
Date: Wed, 22 Dec 1999 21:09:34 +1300

Here‘s one you must watch out for
this comes from a very reliable source

- the most dangerous E-mail virus yet. Please read this to the end,

then delete it immediately WITHOUT READING IT!

*       Not only will this virus completely rewrite your hard drive, but
It will scramble any floppy disks that are within 3 metres
of your computer.

*       It will demagnetise the stripes on your credit cards

*       It will scratch any CDs you try to play.

*       It will change your fridge’s coolness settings so your ice-cream melts

*       It will give your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend your new phone number

*       It will drink all your juice and rip all your tea bags.

*       It will leave dirty socks on the coffee table when you’re
expecting company.

*       It will hide your car keys when you’re late for work and
interfere with your car radio so that you hear only static while
stuck in traffic.

*       It will give you Dutch elm disease and tinea.

*       It will make you "Push" a door that says "Pull".

*       It will rearrange the molecules in your aftershave or perfume, causing
it to smell like sour milk.

*       It will change your Election Day vote to the party you hate the most.
This virus was detected by the Bank of Wallamabolla’s virus scanner.

So be afraid, be very afraid.

The name of this terrible virus?

Just another dumb ass unsubstantiated non existent virus to
start a paranoid mass hysteria mass E-mail mailing to clog up the
mail boxes all around the world.
You might call it Budweiser, or lump of coal, or elfbowling,
or happy holiday? You choose.

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